Studies show that obesity is a fast-growing national health problem and one of the reasons for it is emotional issues that, if left untreated, can cause long-term problems with overeating (source).
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**This article is based on information sourced from social media and psychology websites, cited within the story**
One 22-year-old young woman took to a Reddit post about a situation that involves someone in a group of friends with her who made insensitive fat jokes about her. Evidently, she tried to ignore the friend, but the insults continued until she clapped back.
In the post, she explains that she was pretty obese (her words) but lost 150 pounds. Here is what she said about her weight loss success:
I am proud of myself, it has not been easy but I did it all on my own.
This is what’s good. But she points out that the issue came into play when she was hanging out with a group of friends. This includes a couple (she’s friends with the guy) who had shown that their on-again, off-again relationship was rather toxic.
Then she says the following about her guy friend’s girlfriend hanging out with the group:
She hangs out with our group by proxy, and has been judgmental to many of us in past hang outs.
She further explains:
I haven’t seen this group in almost a year, and since then I lost the remaining weight which really changed my look. My friend group noticed it and were happy to see me this happy, but they also respected the matter and didn’t really pry. No one made extensive comments. Except her.
Basically, she points out in her post the rudeness of this other young woman. This included making comments about her weight loss. Such as:
Wow I didn’t recognize you! . . . You must get a lot of attention.
The poster stated that she just tried to laugh the comments off but said the other woman started questioning her about whether she had surgery to lose the weight because she just could not believe that she’d lost the weight all on her own. To which she responded with another laugh and told her no, it was all her own doing.
She explains further:
We were talking as a group and we got food. She was watching me eat and get food (before when I was obese I was too scared in front of everyone) and she said “wow cheat day for you?”. I just ignored the bitterness in it and replied “who can resist fries” and we all laughed. It finally took a turn when we were all having a convo and she just says to me “right tell me your secret, are you a heavy smoker or burger type?”.
This, evidently, was the straw that broke the camel’s back because she then states:
At that point, I had it. I said how I never asked to be obese. I said how I grew up in an abusive environment where I was force fed a lot and it changed my psyche. I firmly that it took more than just a few “juice diets” and I had to reprogram myself and change my relationship with my health. . . I’m sure we all know what it’s like to be in a toxic relationship (referring to mine with health). I am grateful every day i was able to break mine, can’t say the same for most people, right?
The ordeal ended with the aggressor looking shocked and storming into her boyfriend’s room and the other friends in the group smiling and soft snapping, she explains. But no doubt to her surprise, her guy-friend told her that she was “incredibly mean” to his girlfriend and told her to apologize. To which she asked how could he ignore how his girlfriend treated her so rudely.
Then he told her that she was:
. . . blowing this whole thing out of proportion and . . . was rude for saying the toxic relationship comment since that is “personal”.
It is interesting to note whether this could be a case of gaslighting with her friend telling her that she is blowing the situation “out of proportion” when she clearly did what she could to avoid confrontation. The poster mentions at the bottom of the post how the comments people made brought her “happy tears”. Evidently, the commenters were on her side as she posed a question of whether she was the wrong one.
Related story: Opinion – Gaslighting Phrases Manipulators Use Against Their Victims
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